Valentine’s Day is coming – a great time to think about how to communicate how much you appreciate your loved ones in your life. Communicating your love is sometimes uncomfortable, but always important. Communicating well can be the best way to improve and get what you want out of any relationship. Here are some really easy, inexpensive and tangible ways to do that.
Take heart shaped sticky notes and write love statements (why you love them, or simply write “I love you”). Put them all over a mirror, door, walkway, counter – wherever they will easily find and enjoy the display.
For a variation on this – and especially great for a child – is to write one thing you like about them on their bedroom door every day leading up to Valentine’s Day. A great way to show how much you love them and build up their self esteem.
You can modify either one of these ideas to work for you based on your loved ones personality and preferences (maybe use their favorite color, or cover a plate of cookies with notes, etc.)
It’s easy, inexpensive, and very powerful.
This was done for me once for bosses day – each staff member wrote something they liked about me and put it on a sticky note on my door. I remember walking in to work and seeing it and feeling very special all day. I kept them up as long as I could and smiled each time I saw it.
Simple and powerful. What a great way to communicate your love!
1) Listen without interrupting. Pause, bite your tongue, do whatever it takes to let the other person finish what they are saying before you start talking.
2) Speak without accusing. Use “we” statements and “I” statements. Stay as far away from “You” statements as you can.
3) Answer without arguing. Again, take a breath and try to put yourself in their shoes for a minute. Where are they coming from? Try to agree with at least one thing they said.
4) Enjoy without complaining. Look for the bright side of the situation. You may have gotten lost, but you wouldn’t have seen that really cool scenery. Your coffee may be too strong, but someone went to the trouble to make it for you. Be grateful for that.
5) Promise without forgetting. When you say you’ll do something. Follow through. Never make a promise you aren’t sure you can keep and always write it down or find a way to make sure you do it when you said you would. And do it with a smile – that always makes it that much better.
Now, go out there and show your love!
Betty Lochner is the Owner of Cornerstone Coaching & Training. She specializes in personal and organizational transformation and is the author of Dancing with Strangers: Communication skills for transform your life at work and at home, 52 Communication Tips, and Gladie’s Gift.