Communication Tip: Get Comfortable with the Uncomfortable

Communication Tip

Man’s mind, once stretched by a new idea,

never regains its original dimensions.

~ Oliver Wendell Holmes

Communication Tip: Start Here

If you want to improve your communication skills and become a more confident communicator there is one skill you need to start with:

Get comfortable with the uncomfortable

We tend to repeat what we are comfortable doing.  That means we often put off trying something new because it’s out of our comfort zone. That is why when it comes to communicating well, you need to work to do or say something that you aren’t very comfortable with.

Think about the first time you spoke in front of a group or drove a car.  You were probably nervous and felt uncomfortable.  Yet, by repeating the activity,  you were able to expand your comfort zone and learn a new skill.

It’s the same with all new skills. Sometimes you just need to try it – even though it doesn’t feel comfortable at first.  You’ll find that the more you practice, the easier new skills will become. This is especially true with communication.

Having the courage to that you need to have the conversations that you need to have that may be uncomfortable at first. You will only improve if you start.  And soon you’ll find that the uncomfortable will become more comfortable.

When you do something that is outside of your comfort zone, it actually boosts your energy and makes you want to do it more, attracts more to you, and it grows your confidence! If you aren’t getting outside of your comfort zone you aren’t learning. 

Take baby steps

Small steps will add up to big changes over time.  If you find yourself struggling to take a step forward ask yourself: 

  • What might I be missing out on if I don’t face my fear of doing something new and uncomfortable?
  • What am I scared of?
  • What’s the worst thing that can happen if I try this?

Put this tip into action

Now, go out there and try it this week. No procrastinating allowed. Muster up some courage and just do it.  Then, assess how it went, learn from the experience and the try again. It gets easier each time. I promise.

Practice hard things

Pick a communication challenge – something that you are nervous about doing or that’s clearly out of your comfort zone.  Maybe it’s starting a conversation with your boss, asking for something you need someone to do, or admitting to someone that you were wrong.

More Communication Tips

If you’d like to learn more ways to become a more confident communicator you can find more in 52 Communication Tips.  It’s a great tool for self-development, weekly staff meetings or family dinners to begin to improve your communications skills, one tip at a time.


Betty Lochner is a human resources consultant and expert in workplace communications and relationships. She is the owner and CEO of Cornerstone Coaching & Training, dedicated to helping individuals, work groups and organizations become better communicators and leaders. She is the author of 2 books on communication, and a newly published journal Intentional Gratitude

Cornerstone hosts a twice-annual Women’s Summit that brings women together to learn how to become more confident communicators.

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